9/11 changed the way we fly. New risks created new needs in the way of security for airports and airplanes. We have since become experts in a ritual of undressing and unpacking while standing in line we call going to the airport. We have also learned how to pack based on rules as to what needs to be checked luggage and what the security drones will want to see so we can make the experience as painless as possible.

On Friday I went to the airport at 8:30 am for an International flight that would leave at 10. I was tired and cranky and finally made it into the new terminal that looks like a giant shopping mall with everything from bars to fancy restaurants to a liquor store with no bottles costing less than 80 dollars. As I wandered to my gate with plenty of time to spare, I noticed a poster that said in big letters, "Why You Need To Get To The Airport Two Hours Early" and in much smaller letters a lot of text below it. As fate would have it, I was dying to know why I had to wake up at 6 am for a 10 am flight. When I got close enough to the poster to read it, I realized that it was a listing of every store, restaurant, and service at DFW airport very similar to the maps you see in malls. In effect, I have to get to the airport earlier so I can have more time to spend more money. As you can assume, this attempt to be cute in advertising was not exactly giving me the warm fuzzies, but it did get me thinking.

Have you ever looked at the list of items you cannot bring on an airplane? You can't bring tweezers, but you can bring, or even buy in the terminal, a nice pointy sharp metal pen. You can't bring wire, but we all have strong shoelaces. No liquids or creams, but as much powder as you want, and if you get thirsty, you can buy some water in the terminal. Fun science fact, most creams and liquids are made by mixing solids and water in factories, but I digress.

My point is this. The list seems arbitrary. If I want to hurt people, I'll find a way to do it, even if I can't bring my tweezers on board. Before someone calls Homeland Security on me, I am not saying we should do away with security. I do wish that the security measures made more sense and wasted less of my irreplaceable time. I also will not claim to know how to do this or what the right thing to do is. That s a very complicated problem and I do not think anybody is saying otherwise. Luckily it seems that there are some smart people working on it because there have been no significant attacks since 9/11. What I will say is that arbitrary and ever- changing lists of reactionary regulations are not making anything any safer, they are only making it harder for people to fly. Finally, for all the talk of taking security seriously, it's absurd to have an airport advertisement saying that the security measures exist for airport vendors to be more profitable. Does the airport really need to fuel my cynicism about the government beyond its current state?

-Evil I (formerly Dallas Guy)